Amit Chaudhary ⋅ San Jose, CA Doordash, Silicon Valley Software Company ⋅ 20 years experience

Hello Craig,

It is is well written profile, you have filled sections in details.

Here are my thoughts on the Linkedin Profile as it exists today.

-Please search for others in your desired role & location & shortlist 3 such profiles. I will refer to them below

-Try 2 different professional headlines(Edit button near your profile\Photo), maybe each for 2 months one, one covers your desired role, as an example,
Certified Manager looking for Project & Program Manager roles
Other is a more detailed version without the seeking indication
Certified Project Manager or
HR & Training Manager

I picked above as one is your work experience & other is certification.

-The photo incl. clothes, location are nice, including waist up, but eye contact would be useful, see https://www.linkedin.com/profile/view?id=223865322&authType=name&authToken=9rgV&offset=7&trk=prof-sb-pdm-similar-photo

-Create a summary section, as an format, consider two paragraphs, one with domain knowledge like training, specific parts of project, another with tools such as Microsoft Office including .... Use the profiles as reference.

-For your experience, consider breaking each into some work area, one would be Leadership assistance, another would be training prep & delivery, another can be budget allocation, etc.

-Join all the groups the profiles are in. If you are in the same group, HR team can send linkedin emails without paying them, making it less expensive.
It is also a way of finding candidates

-Under Settings, Communications on left button using following link
https://www.linkedin.com/settings/?trk=nav_account_sub_nav_settings
goto "Select the types of messages you're willing to receive" & enable all or those you prefer. Also, put some advice if relevant.

Best of Luck!

Regards
Amit

PS: I also second Marc's advise, it is practical & what I have seen in the real world/

Daniel Arturi ⋅ Chicago, IL CORT ⋅ 20 years experience

I wanted to quickly add that Marc Krass' advice to shorten things up is good, but you also do want to be very careful about the language/terminology you use. If you cut it down too much, you may miss including some keywords that recruiters and hiring managers look for.

Look at LinkedIn as a search engine optimizer would: it's a great place to put words that get recruiters to find you, and they WILL read deeply into your profile, because they are not going to waste time on someone they don't know much about.

Use as many verbs as possible: "led a team"... "executed a project"... "transitioned a team"... recruiters and hiring manage look for these little action phrases. Avoid "managed", "responsible for..." and other terms that really don't tell the story of what you did at each job you had. Make every word count, paint a picture, as Josh Margolis said... explain to me what you did that made you successful in each role.

Hope that helps!

Jeff Zych ⋅ Homer Glen, IL IBM ⋅ 20 years experience

Craig,

In the "big data" world of today, companies use analytic tools to assign scores to profiles on Linked-In and other public sites. Then they find matches to their candidate profiles. Key word searches and phrases are used to score your profile against the profile of the job or employee they organization seeks. Take some time and study this practice off articles on the web. I recommend a Google search on "Tips for Resume Scoring" There are even sites to score a resume for you. Know what to say and how!
Jeff

Marc Krass ⋅ Kansas City, MO Procter & Gamble Company ⋅ 37 years experience

I want to build on Josh Margolis's excellent advice. Your LinkedIn profile, like your resume, should be half as long as it is. The Summary should begin by crisply stating that you are ending X years of military service on Y date and are seeking a civilian position focused on doing A, B and/or C. Eliminate content about what frustrates executives and talk only about the broad categories of things you can do. State that you are a Lean Six Sigma Green Belt up front, since that says a lot about what you can do. Cut your other sections down significantly, because people don't read very far. Delete items about high school or what you did more than 10 years ago, since they don't carry much weight in comparison to what you've done in the last five years or so. Bottom line, help your audience focus on what you seek and what you can do for them.

Dr. Scena Webb ⋅ Auburn, WA Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms (ATF) ⋅ 15 years experience

Hi Craig,

I just sent you an invitation to connect on LInkedIn. The larger your network of veterans, the more opportunity there may be to connect with someone in your field.

Scena

Josh Margolis ⋅ Columbus, OH CRM Insights LLC ⋅ 40 years experience

Craig,

Are you separating soon? If so you'll want to think of a description to replace "Military Professional." Also, begin your summary of experience with a short statement of what you can do for me. Remember that I'm very selfish. I don't really care about you. I want to know if you can make/save me money and/or time, increase my productivity, find me the right people, implement a better HRMS. And use emotional words: challenged, frustrated, struggling, embarrassed ("Are you embarrassed about the impression you make on job applicants who apply online?"). Get my juices flowing. The military, pilots, others in extreme situations communicate in flat, unemotional phrases. When Sullenberger was landing his US Airways 737 in the Hudson, a controller told him to return to LaGuardia. Sully's response: "Unable." That's a little too curt for this purpose.

Also, I suggest you books with titles like "How to Find a Job" or "How to Interview." Look for sales books like "Spin Selling." The golden rule is "Shut up and Listen." As much as you want to tell someone your life story, ask questions (you'll have to be prepared and LinkedIn is a good place to start), and respond to the interviewer's response, not to a talking point on your list. It's a conversation and the more the interviewer talks, the more he/she'll think you're a genius (not that you aren't). Again, remember I'm selfish, I like to hear myself talk--and write long responses.

Josh

Craig Petronella ⋅ Clarksville, TN U.S. Army, Master Sergeant ⋅ 19 years served

Marc,

Thank you I will focus my summary and job description.

Craig

Craig Petronella ⋅ Clarksville, TN U.S. Army, Master Sergeant ⋅ 19 years served

My linkedIn profile is: https://www.linkedin.com/in/craigpetronella

Craig Petronella ⋅ Clarksville, TN U.S. Army, Master Sergeant ⋅ 19 years served

Josh,

Thank you for the advise. I will look at improving my profile off your guidance. I never thought to read a Sales book but I can see where it will benefit now.

Amit Chaudhary ⋅ San Jose, CA Doordash, Silicon Valley Software Company ⋅ 20 years experience

Hello Craig,

I did not see link to your profile. Can you share it here or private message me & I will take a look.

It would also help to know which roles & industry you are looking for.

Regards
Amit